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By: Jamie Collins
I’ve found that some of the best advice I’ve ever received is often found in a meaningful line of text or by way of an unexpected introduction to a simple concept that I come across, here or there, perhaps via a blog or article, and it sticks with me. It’s those seemingly small, but inspirational thoughts that I can immediately draw upon and begin to implement in my life.
Today, I’m here to let you in on a little secret, TPS paralegals. It’s about the one thing you need to possess for just 20 seconds in order to succeed in the paralegal world, and for that matter, the “regular” world too. You Interested? Fantastic! Sip that cup of Joe or that ice cold Diet Coke, and delve right in, my friends. Your 20 second success plan awaits…
Several months ago, my family and I decided to catch a movie. Admittedly, it can be a bit of a challenge to find a good, family friendly movie that captivates the attention of both, my adorable six year old son, Gavin, and his super cool parents. On this particular occasion, we set our sights on Matt Damon and Scarlett Johansson, as we ventured out to the local movie theatre to watch “We Bought a Zoo.” I know, I know, it sounds a bit corny, right? Fortunately, it actually turned out to be a pretty good movie for all involved…even the super cool parents.
Matt Damon’s character in the movie taught his children a profound lesson about stepping outside of their comfort zone. He stated that he had lived his life adhering to a mantra: to step up and embrace pivotal moments when life-changing opportunities presented themselves, by mustering “twenty seconds of insane courage.” The more I considered this piece of advice, the more I came to the realization that it’s absolutely true.
As I sit here typing this post, I can think of many times when I’ve had to harness about 20 seconds of insane courage to get me from one moment into the next, whether it was to propel myself into the next phase, a more challenging project, out of a bad situation and into a better one, into the courtroom to assist with my first jury trial in a state of utter cluelessness or up in the front of a classroom (with my knees knocking) to give a speech. Yep, 20 seconds of insane courage is about all it takes to charge through the gate of self-doubt and personal worry and into something great. 20 seconds.
Yet, this movie is not what inspired me to write this post. One day last week, I picked Gavin up early from school to take him for academic testing. You see, Gavin is currently in kindergarten at a private school, and we find ourselves struggling over our school options for next year. We’re currently zoned into a school district we do not care for, and will not send him to. The words “less than desirable” readily come to mind. As fate (or misfortune) would have it, we live one street over from a preferred school district. So, with that being said, I was driving Mister G to undergo academic testing at the “preferred” school district, in an attempt to gain him admission, pursuant to a new school “choice” plan we have in Indiana. Thankfully, the boy is smart. After all, he does have super cool parents.
Anyway, on the way to the test, Gavin asked a very important question. He turned to me, and in the most sincere and innocent voice, said, “Mommy, I don’t know why, but I feel like I’m ready to go take the test and I want to, but I feel a little worried. I don’t know why.” My mommy rally speech went a little something like this: “That’s completely normal, buddy. Mommy is scared to do things all the time and I feel just like that, but I do them anyway. Like when mommy spoke at that school recently, I was nervous, but I didn’t let it stop me. I did it anyway, and the more you do stuff like that, even when you feel nervous, the easier it is to do more things like that. Then you get really good at it.”
It was in that moment that I realized 6-year-olds and grown-ups have a lot in common. It was also in that moment when I realized that it’s my job to help him harness his 20 seconds of courage, when needed, and to teach him “how” to do that as quickly as possible. It’s my job, and you can bet your paralegal behinds, I’m going to fully embrace it. And you know what — I’m not going to just assist Gavin with mustering his 20 seconds of insane courage. I’m going to start seizing my own 20 seconds every chance I get.
People sometimes get hung up on what it takes to succeed (often in this field) and how hard it can be, and what a long road it is, and on all the things standing in their way, but seriously, who in the world doesn’t possess the innate capability to harness just 20 second of inner power to move from here to there, now to then, from a moment into success? Not this girl. I’ve got 20 seconds all-day-long…and then some.
When I think about it, I realize that there have been many, many moments that I’ve summoned 20 seconds of insane courage to carry me from a starting moment through confident completion, from a challenge into success, and from the person I was 20 seconds ago, to the person I am standing in this very moment.
The next time you find yourself about to step out of your comfort zone and into the gauntlet, remember, it’s…just…20…seconds. Perhaps the reason only 20 seconds is required is because once you start, you have no choice, but to take a paralegal swan dive, because you’re going to do it…or die trying. After all, you are a paralegal. That’s how we roll. It’s simply how we’re wired. You’re either all in or walking away before the gun goes off. There is no try. We do or we do not. Period. As Napoleon Bonaparte so succinctly stated, “If you start to take Vienna – take Vienna.” And if you’re a paralegal…take it by storm.
It’s just a matter of standing up, moving to the front of the room, opening your mouth, and starting to speak or agreeing to take on a new endeavor, harnessing your inner nerves, silencing your doubts, and diving off that comfortable paralegal plateau, and into the discomfort zone, because that is where glory awaits, my friends. It’s just outside your comfort zone. It’s just beyond this moment’s grasp.
So, the next time you find yourself gripped in fear, palms sweaty, mouth dry, knees knocking, with your heart palpitating right out of your chest, before you do “it,” whatever “it” may be, just remember, it’s…only…20…seconds…between this moment — right here and now — and greatness.
Matt Damon and Gavin taught me that.
Dang it J. How did you learn to write like this? This is a totally awesome article.
I agree with you 100% and I never even thought about the “20 seconds” until now, but it’s totally true. I guess I’ve been using it my whole life, but never realized it. The next time I got to do something like approach someone new or make a speech in public I’m going to be thinking of Mr. G and his experience in the car. If he can do it, I can do it too.
You’ve written a lot of useful things on your blog, but for me this ranks toward the top.
Hey Jamie, I saw “We Bought a Zoo” with my children as well (for some reason, I cried all the way through it). I too was inspired by the “20 seconds of insane courage” speech. It is a great way to take an overwhelming task and break it down into something more manageable and less scary – we can do almost anything for 20 seconds. Thank you my friend for the inspiration!
Eric and Misty, I’m so glad you enjoyed this post! As a writer, it’s always nice to hear what readers think of the stuff you create when you stay up really late on Friday night to write, while your family is fast asleep! The creativity seems to flow better in the 1-2 a.m. window!
Eric, I had the same reaction you did. I think the reason I love the “20 seconds” advice so much is because it can truly become a total “go-to” piece of advice (as you mentioned), for any future situations where you find you are a bit nervous, overwhelmed or stressed. It gives you a new and refreshing way to get yourself into “the zone,” to buckle down and dive right in. And lord knows paralegals definitely need to be “in the zone” quite often! ha ha.
Misty, I have to admit, I cried through the end of that movie too! Whew. I guess we can chalk it up to being a mom thing! It got me. Thanks so much for sharing your experience with the movie and your thoughts on the “20 seconds” advice. Glad to hear you walked away from the movie with inspiration too..and I’m not the only weepy movie goer out there!
Who would have thought a family movie could lead us into this fun discussion?
The price of a great movie for three – about $37
time spent with family – unquantifiable
those things, plus an inspirational movie blog post to boot – priceless!
Jamie,
This is a great article and l am so grateful to you that you take your time out to write and share it with all of us. It’s amazing what of masterpieces you are capable of creating.
So many times l felt like G-Man, holding myself back because of that 20 second period of time and finding myself in doubt of my capabilities and abilities. But, l have been so lucky of being surrounded by people that have always encouraged me and trusted me(as you did with your baby). In this way l have crossed this 20 second “inner test” successfully. It’s not easy though to deal with it….it takes courage, preparation, confidence, bravery…..and TIME, as well.
l am looking forward for more articles from you, Jamie.
Respectfully,
Gjineta
Great post! Once again so timely. One of my favorite quotes from Joyce Meyers.” Do it afraid”
I love this post and I do think 20 seconds can change your life and the world – but my mind kept wondering if maybe the 20-seconds might have resulted in staying at the “undesireable” school and be a part of something bigger than you ever dreamed, resulting in changes to that school that not only impowered your son, but all of the children who needed your help? I wanted your car to turn around. Now that would have been priceless. (I know, completely off subject)
What a great article, very well written! I am a teacher in the Paralegal Program at Oakland University and would like to share the whole article with my students. Unfortunately, it won’t let me print it – would you be willing to e-mail it to me? Cynthia.Whitcomb@CEFLawyers.com Thank you!
Gjineta, Thank you for your comment! It is very kind. I’m glad you are fighting your way through your 20 seconds with the help of others! It’s so great having your positive energy in the TPS group. Thanks for your comment!
Anne-Marie, What a great quote! So true.
Marion, Thanks for your comment. I respect your opinion. I can honestly tell you that I saw Gavin take charge of his 20 seconds on that day. He passed all the tests with flying colors and when they told him to count as high as he could without stopping, he made it to 101 before she told him that was far enough and he could stop. (Apparently, he is supposed to be able to count to 20 per the state guidelines). This is just our choice. That’s all. We each have one and this is ours. I believe in my son and what he can (and will) do too much to remove him a thriving school environment and put him into an elementary school that is rated at 3/10 (which feeds into a high school that turns out an astonomical amount of graduates who can’t even read – literally). It’s just my choice. I want to help him reach his full potential, and I felt my 20 seconds were best spent driving to the place where he dominated that placement test!
On a sidenote, I did see this experience change Gavin for the better. We went to a wedding about a week ago and there was noone on the dance floor early on. About 4 songs in, my husband went to get us cake. I was watching my husband walk away on the cake reconnaissance mission, when something caught my eye out on the dance floor….it was Gavin…and he was putting on a full-on choreographed routine a/k/a dance clinic on that empty dance floor while 50 adult onlookers watched. It took me by suprise because it was totally (and I mean totally) out of character for him. I know he felt nervous about dancing because he completely refused to go dance when we repeatedly asked him if he wanted to as he bee-bopped around while sitting in his chair, but a good song came on, and he decided to harness that 20 seconds and show the room his “Moves like Jaggar!!” ha ha. Yep, 20 seconds….about how long it takes to walk out to the dance floor. Thanks for stopping by TPS, Marion. I appreciate your comment.
Cynthia, Absolutely! We’d love for you to share the article with your students! I’ll e-mail a copy of it to you today. It’s always nice to see an educator around TPS!
~ Jamie
Thank you Jamie! This article was just what I needed. My day has been rather difficult and emotional. Four years ago today I lost my uncle to a brain tumor. He was an incredibly courageous man who dedicated his life to loving and helping others. He is the reason I stepped out in a moment of courage 3 1/2 years ago to become a paralegal. If he were still with us, I can imagine him saying to me exactly what this article said, so thank you!
I wonder where I will be able to test my 20 second choice today?
Gratefully,
Sara
Sara, I am sorry to hear about the loss of your uncle, but glad you reached out to share a bit about him with all of us. He sounds like a good, strong, and kind man. I am honored that you would find my article comforting on this difficult day. Remember, even the worst day only has 24 hours. Tomorrow will be a new day. I look forward to seeing you “around” TPS!
It is that sweet sensation of knowledge and inspiration that one gets from reading your articles that makes you so special. And I couldn’t understand why it took me 20 seconds to say so. TFS.
Absolutely!
“Do, or do not. There is no ‘try.’”- Jedi Master, Yoda
Thanks so much, Leonard. That truly means a lot to me. It really does.
Deborah, absolutely! I think Yoda must have been a paralegal at heart!
This is a great article/post. I believe that this article can inspire not only paralegals but secretaries, legal assistances, anyone and everyone. We are after all just human beings struggling with the same hopes, dreams and fears. Some of us forge ahead and some are still sitting in the stands with regret but have the dream of next time being fearless for just 20-seconds. Thanks again for reminding us to jump into the deep end and start swimming there are great things at the other end of the pool
I’m glad you enjoyed it, Deborah! I think you’re absolutely right. This article/post applies to all humans – paralegals and non-paralegals, alike. If you are a living, breathing person, you’re gonna have “20 seconds” at some juncture to do (or not to do) something great! I’ll see you in the deep end of the pool, Deborah. Thanks for stopping by!
Hi Jamie, you know you touch on something so profoundly real. I know I just recently got my P1 and looking for a job. I saw the movie too, and thought it was a great movie too. Thank you for your inspiring writing.
Thanks for your comment, Marilyn! I really appreciate it. Best of luck on your job search! Be sure to check out our article on job hunting written by Kathryn Gordon. It’s a good one!
Here’s the link: http://theparalegalsociety.wordpress.com/2011/09/26/%e2%80%9cwhat-to-do-when-you-can%e2%80%99t-find-your-first-paralegal-position%e2%80%9d/
Now go take the paralegal world by storm!!
Fantastic article as usual, Jamie. I have to pass this on to my daughter who has a 5 1/2 year old son (my daughter is not a paralegal, but I do think it will help her to understand her mother a bit more and it is also advice that she can use to help her kindergartner harness his 20 seconds!).